Friday, February 04, 2005

voodoo you think I am?

Well, I've heard it all now. Apparently there's a zombie going around frightening the chickens in the middle of the night. Can you believe it?! A zombie!
And the chickens want to catch this zombie but reckon he's disguised himself as one of us on the farm. And according to them, the only way you can spot a zombie is that one of their legs are shorter than the other. And they have mad eyes.

Which is why everyone has been spying on ME! There's a rumour going around the entire farm that because my legs are wonky and I have weird looking eyes, therefore I'm the flipping zombie!
Has the world gone mad?! Why would I want to be a zombie? And who says my eyes are weird looking? I've a good mind to see Farmer Jack and tell him I've had enough and I'm moving up North, 'cos people appreciate me there.

But seeing as I'm a zombie, he'd probably lock me away.

I need a plan of action, and fast!


Anonymous said...

Are you sure that this Zombie is not just Daniel Bedingfield out for revenge after that rather fetching picture you posted of him? I thought it was stunningly accurate but he might have had other ideas! Come up north! You are welcome at our house! We have a large back garden at your disposal!!

Derek said...

you know what? I might just take you up on that. A nice garden would suit me fine. Have you got a little barn for me to sleep in, or can I kip on the couch?

Anonymous said...

Of course you can sleep on the couch!(just don't tell my mummy!) or, if you prefer I am sure we could find you a spare sleeping bag so you be all warm and toasty! i bet it gets a bit drafty in the fields sometimes! And rest assured you do not look like a Zombie!

Doodleteen said...

Chickens are chickens, if they were smart they'd have worked out how to get out of pies and McNuggets.

Derek said...

I reckon once you're a chicken McNugget, there's not much going back, no matter how smart you are.
Although I could be proved wrong.

Emz said...

Now why on earth would they think you're the zombie? I've never noticed your wonky legs before!

Derek said...

Chickens ain't the brightest birds in the world.